“People admit it’s hard to pray. Yet they think it’s easy to make love. What nonsense. Neither is worth much when it is only the outcropping of intermittent enthusiasm. Both need to be done without ceasing; and that puts a premium on the minor manifestations. Obviously the sexual act itself is central. But the circle that is drawn around it consists of a thousand small passes and light touches. What they lack in moment they more than make up for by sheer weight of numbers, and it is a poor bed that sees only the grand piece of business that really arrives. It is precisely the unconsummated nonsense that makes the main absurdity fruitful. Sexual intercourse is indeed society (though often not too mutual), and it is certainly a comfort, when it goes well; but it is seldom much help unless its disastrousness is softened by a vast amount of incidental tenderness.” – Robert Farrar Capon, Bed and Board .